Temporarily living
in an Eastern warm culture, we have come to both appreciate many of the
differences and despise some of the others.
From privacy to faith, time to gender expectations to attitudes towards
education and sanitation, we have noticed a significant gap in our opposing
cultures. I suppose you can call our
realization and frustration with these differences “culture shock,” but I feel
like it is less of a shock and more of an awakening. Shock to me sounds so serious, whereas I
think this experience is just helping me to become a more rounded, thankful
person. WARNING: Please note that any observations I make from here on out are obviously generalized and not true for all Ugandans...I am writing from what I have seen and experienced.
One of the
largest shifts in thinking we have had to make is from independent to communal
living. Ugandans live a dependent
lifestyle, relying on their families and communities to care for them when they
are old, to mourn together, to spread news and to watch over their children. It is beautiful the way they support each
other through life, sickness and even death. Many times we have driven to work
and passed group after group of brightly-dressed walkers, making the long
journey to a distant town to attend a burial of someone they may have never
met. Privacy is almost unheard of, but
there is not much of a choice since most live in one or two room mudhomes. And they are so welcoming; if you walk on
their property they run after you to offer you food and a place to sit. In North America, you are lucky if the home
owner asks you politely to get off their lawn, but far more likely to be chased
down by an old geezer with a cane ;)
We have also
had to adjust to the Ugandan definition of necessity. For starters, they put a higher price on education,
than they do on food. Many families eat
only one meager meal a day so that they can send their children to school. They largely overlook the need for cleanliness
and nutrition. Some may say it is just a
lack of knowledge and different priorities, but I have noticed it is more about
their fear of change and new things.
Even when they learn about the importance of being clean and boiling
their water, they seem apprehensive to alter their behaviours. As well, clothing’s sole purpose is to do
just that: clothe you. It does not
matter if it fits, or if it was intended to be worn by boy or a girl. In fact it doesn’t even matter if it has curse
words and naughty pictures, as long as it covers most of you. And just like clothes, food is only meant to
feed you. The concept of “not liking” a
food is almost unheard of; they like all food as long as it fills their bellies
and does not make them sick.
The two
differences I have had the most trouble becoming accustomed to are the gender
roles and the definitions of time. For
those of you who know me well, I am a strong-willed, direct and not-overly-dainty
woman. Let me tell you, none of these
characteristics jive well with this culture J Someone once told me that in North America we
may have watches, but in Africa they have the time. Ugandans are more concerned with building
relationship than keeping a tight schedule.
In business and everyday life, it is imperative that you take the time
to ask how someone’s day is before you ask them any questions. As for gender roles, let’s just say that
Uganda is still in the 1960’s, with the exception of legal polygamy. Men marry younger women and when their first
wife is getting too old for their liking, they marry another one. If a husband dies, his widow(s) is disowned
by her in-laws, and will rarely remarry because a new husband would reject her
children. Spousal abuse, although
publicly frowned upon, is still widely prominent, with many men believing it is
their right to physically reprimand their wives for insubordination.
Over the last
two months we have felt a strong shift in our perspectives on life and I’m
excited for what the next four months holds for us.
~Melissa
